- Focus any mental energy left from the day on which lane may be fastest.
- Insert vehicle in lane.
- Begin surfing radio stations for something that will keep me awake.
- Check out mentally for a few moments, then pull ahead keeping the gap as we get nearer the light.
- Begin surfing radio stations for something that will keep me awake.
- Check out mentally for a few moments, then pull ahead keeping the gap as we get nearer the light.
- Begin surfing radio stations....
Finally, as I pull into the lead position to be the next to go, there is one more thing I do. Ignore the "job disadvantaged shower deprived person" looking for a handout. Now that sounds a bit harsh, but I suppose I've been somewhat jaded as they become part of the on ramp experience in my suburban existence and then fade in my rear view mirror. We (i.e. church people) acknowledge that they have tangible needs, but then seem to qualify our reluctance to help because they are probably going to go spend the money on booze or drugs. We're conditioned to think in this way:
So, a few days ago as I was almost to the light I glanced at the SUV next to me on my right. Young guy, nice ride, probably high tech employee...as he's talking on his cell phone and ON TOP of his car is his laptop! I tried to get his attention but he did not see me, so I resorted to a few light taps on my horn. Catching his eye, I made hand motions that if, I was a signal man on an aircraft carrier; would have plunged an F-18 right into the ocean. Finally, after some interesting gesturing he got the message and mouthed thank you as he opened his door and received the errant laptop.
I felt oh so noble, helping out a brother; perhaps saving him from a hard drive disaster and seeing shards of laptop sprayed out onto the asphalt. But then, looking to my left; I see him and make eye contact - yes, a beggar looking for a handout in ragged clothes holding the obligatory sign indicating his service in Vietnam, any amount will help, and God Bless me. Almost then as an observer to the scene, I watched my face become void of emotion or acknowledgement and turn my eyes back to the on ramp traffic.
I am conflicted.
Now, most days I spend a few bucks on a mocha in my morning ritual. I usually have anywhere between $5.00 - $20.00 in my wallet on any given day. I could have handed him a fiver and not even noticed a financial impact. But then, what if I was enabling him? He could have taken a shower at a shelter, used my fiver and perhaps a few other donations to get a haircut and shave, and apply for a job. But what if he spends my hard earned money on Mad Dog or meth?
Should I judge him or help him?
Look at this passage from Job (31:16-22):
"If I have denied the desires of the poor or let the eyes of the widow grow weary, if I have kept my bread to myself, not sharing it with the fatherless...if I have seen anyone perishing for lack of clothing, or a needy man without a garment, and his heart did not bless me for warming him with the fleece from my sheep....then let my arm fall from the shoulder, let it be broken off at the joint".
Ouch!
But wait, there's more - other passages such as Psalm 41:1 & Matthew 25:34 - 46 (and many more) show our duty to assist fellow travelers on the road of life. But then I came across an interesting passage in Leviticus (19:15, NLT):
Always judge your neighbors fairly, neither favoring the poor nor showing deference to the rich.
So I suppose there is a degree of judgment we use. Now, how to reconcile? As I've prayed about this I believe God does want me to give some financial help, so yes I will give him a fiver. I think God also wants him to know that he is loved and there is hope, so I will write him a little note. Am I obligated to give him money every time I see him? I don't think so.
But I am conflicted.
